It used to be that bachelor parties were thrown by men who feared the end of the good life and freedom. It was a Rite Of Passage that signaled the end of an era when commitment reared its ugly head spawning a series of bad choices and drunken nights. This was their last ditch effort, (mostly predictable) which was chock full of embarrassing moments and juicy, life-long blackmail material. You get the picture. And hopefully, during this night ("the" night of their lives), a toast was offered in honor of the bride followed by the traditional smashing of the glasses to punctuate that fateful moment. After a time, (long over-due) the ladies came up with this "equality version" known as the bachelorette party so as not to be outdone or left in the dust. A stretch limo was a good (and smart) excuse to get completely blasted while they ventured into the world of male strippers. Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to spoil anyone's night of fun. I'm just here to offer a few creative ideas, and some sound advice. Take it for what it's worth. Hopefully, it's all good in the end. This is certainly not original advice but is often a point overlooked. DO NOT HAVE YOUR PARTY THE NIGHT BEFORE THE WEDDING. This is just plain stupid and completely unnecessary unless your intention is to feel and look like death-warmed-over. Make sure you make your best man and maid of honor aware of this well in advance with perhaps a few reminders along the way. Now for some nifty ideas for you and your closest friends. Men and women have been divided to uphold the Mars and Venus thing, but ideas can apply to both.

For the Men: (try combinations of any of the following)
=>Gambling either at a casino, or maybe a night of Card playing.

=>Skydiving (for the daring!)

=>Hiking and/or camping

=>Cigar lounges and bar hopping (designate a driver or get a limo).

=>Box seats at a sporting event

=>Private room in a restaurant (so rowdy is no object)

=>Sports bar. Schedule according to game times.

=>Hotels - If you're going to do this, bring your own booze and junk food. Make sure you hide the key to the mini bar.

A $10 bottle of Heineken and $5 bag -0- peanuts don't taste any different.

For the Girls:

=>Wine tasting

=>A day at the spa

=>Make your own video (interviews: how friends met etc.)

=>Dinner and Theatre or Concert

=>Psychic or Astrology party

=>Karaoke

=>Hiking and maybe overnight at a quaint Bed & Breakfast. Be creative, let loose and have fun. Bonding's a beautiful thing.

Bachelor/ Bachelorette Party

The get together known as the "bachelor party" or "stag party," has recently been joined by a female counterpart known as the bachelorette party.

Like the bachelor party, the bachelorette party has become a celebration of the end of "being single" and usually includes the immediate wedding party and very close friends of the bride or groom. The best man or maid of honor is usually in charge of coordinating the event.

Be creative when planning your party. A room in a restaurant, a hotel or a spa suite are popular party locations because they allow you to fully enjoy yourselves without disturbing other guests. Bar hopping or nightclubs with comedy or live entertainment are other popular choices. And while you're out enjoying the evening, avoid any problems with drinking and driving by treating yourself to a night out in a limousine or perhaps a double decker bus.

For a party at home, video movie rentals or comedy grams can provide fun and memorable entertainment. Wherever your party is held, you can cater it yourself with prepared party trays and "just heat and serve" entrees from local specialty stores or caterers.

The bachelor or bachelorette party sometimes takes the form of a shower, with the bride or groom receiving small gifts. Lingerie, gag gifts, or things to use on the honeymoon are popular themes for this type of party.

Be sure to preserve the evening in pictures. These party pictures will create an album of laughs that will last long after the party's over!

This party is best held a week or two before the wedding; not the night before! That way you won't be putting anything in the way of your enjoyable wedding day.

Bachelor Party Checklist
 

• Timing - Try not to have the party on the eve of the wedding. This is very bad for everyone involved including your friend. It is highly likely that he (or she) will be spending a good part of their life savings the following day, they will want to be sober for it. A week in advance is a good idea. Even a month in advance is acceptable. Friday and Saturday nights are best.

• Food - You probably won't be expected to truly feed everyone, however you should provide something to eat. It could be pot luck (in the case of a bachelorette party) or it could be included in the admission charge (in the case of a bachelor party). Make sure you have a handle on the

  • Type

  • Amount

  • Timing

  • Provider (caterer, pizza place, your mom, etc.)

• Facility - If the party is going to be a little larger than you can handle in your house, you can:

  • Hold it at a friends house! or

  • Have it outside (as in a cookout)

  • Rent a hall - This is a common solution for bachelor parties because they can be a little rowdy and halls are generally free of anything breakable.

No matter where you have the party you still may need some items such as tables, chairs, and maybe even table cloths. Usually rental companies (look up "rental" in the yellow pages) have these items at reasonable prices.

• Entertainment - This is covered in a few other areas on the site. You might want to choose a couple from the list of : Games, gags, gifts, movies, and live entertainment.

• Transportation - Make sure that someone is going to be responsible for transporting your crowd of crazed party-goers to their destination. Renting a Limousine is nice but is quite expensive ($300 or so is not unreasonable for 8 people for the night). Renting a large passenger van is usually not very expensive and they can carry as many as 15 people (usually about $70 but you'll need a sober friend to drive). This might make a rental van a good alternative. Make sure you have a responsible driver that can handle staying out until everyone is dropped off.

• Itinerary - Sometimes it helps if you know where you will be going. If you call ahead, most strip clubs will waive the cover charge for bachelor or bachelorette parties. If not, they will surely save the bride or groom-to-be a place down front.

Don't tell everyone the itinerary. Telling the itinerary in advance will cause the future spouse to find out (trust us, they will). Keep it a secret until the party begins.

• Be Sneaky - You should make sure that you have something up your sleeve. Remember, this party is not thrown to honor the soon to be married, it is to convince them that they are making the right decision. Why not send them off with a reminder of how cruel everyone except their spouse can be. Here are some ideas:

  • Replace stripper with dominatrix. I was at a party where the dominatrix dressed the groom up in a dress. It was hilarious (unless you were the groom).

  • Have stripper embarrass the bride. I've heard of a club where the male took off his thong to reveal the brides name tagged to his penis.

  • Have stripper embarrass the groom.

  • Here are some bachelor party faux pas:

    • No pictures are allowed.

    • No telling their future spouse where you will be.

    • You should try to respect the wishes of the bride or groom but not necessarily the wishes of their future spouse.

    • No PG rated parties.

Bachelorette Check List

Here is a fun list of items that you can make the Bachelorette do on her last night out.

Bachelorette Scavenger Hunt

This hunt is designed for the guests to laugh, while the bachelorette completes the tasks. Alternatively, the group could split into multiple teams to each complete the tasks - using a polaroid camera to verify task completion.

1) Find a guy who lets you paint his toenails. Grab toe jam for bonus points.

2) Ask a guy (not the bartender) for change for the condom machine.

3) Standing on a chair, remove your bra. Some guys would love it if you took off your shirt to do this, but I don't know many girls that don't know how to take off their bra with their shirt still on.

4) Collect a pair of men's underwear. Points deducted for skid marks.

5) Kiss the ugliest guy in the room. Who determines who's ugly and who's pretty? This debate of who to kiss could become a game in itself. Advice: don't suggest a partygoer's spouse, or your Uncle Ralph.

6) Collect 10 men's business cards with a "good luck" message on the back of the card (pass them to your eligible friends).

7) Find a poster of a guy: erotically kiss and caress the picture. A great place for this is at a movie theatre - lots of people standing in line for Star Wars will be entertained when your bachelorette goes crazy over a poster of some lame actor.

8) Rub two different liquors on either side of your neck. Have guys sample them and guess the flavor until someone gets both liquors correct. Laugh hysterically while weird guys lick your friends neck, and ponder the taste the just sampled.

9) Perform a tequila body shot: drink the tequila from a shot glass; lick salt from a guy's neck; bite the lime from the guy's mouth. Lip lock has been know to occur during this last step if the body used for the shot is appealing to the bachelorette.

10) Depending on your creativeness and some personal insight you may invent a few more tasks for this list. This is your big chance to get even with that rotten, no good bachelorette friend your jealous of.

Bachelor Dress Up Game

Here is a fun game you can play at a Bachelorette Party.

You might also be able to play it at a Bachelor Party, but it might not work as well.

The game is called "Dress Up The Doll". Here is what you will need:

1. Hand-cuffs

2. A blow up guy doll.

3. A public place with lots of guys.

First, cuff the blow up doll to the bride-to-be. Next, bring both characters to the public place. The object of the game is to ask guys to give you articles of clothing so that the bride can cover up her "boyfriend's" nudity. She wins when he is fully clothed (just like in strip-poker, socks count but hats do not).

Guys will be stopping left and right to offer you their clothes. Some of them might even strip down to give up their underwear. Trust me however, you might not want to handle a guys underwear (those skid marks will kill you). Try not to set up shop outside of a Mexican restaurant.

If the bride is a little shy, the bridal party can help out. You might find it takes very little effort to get guys to talk to a woman who is handcuffed to a blow up doll.

Bachelor parties might have more trouble with this game because women that are out on a Friday night aren't going to give up their clothes. Most women will be wearing their newest, most expensive stuff and I doubt they will give it to a bunch of drunk guys. Men are more willing to give up clothing. Heck, most of you buy the stuff at Old Navy for less than 10 bucks anyway.

I Never - The Bachelorette Party Game

Here is how to play: Sit in a circle or around a table. Each person will read a phrase starting with "I never". Anyone who has done this fiendish act must drink. The innocent women do not have to drink (they never have any fun anyway).

Here is an example: The Bachelorette says "I never kissed a man over 40 years old". This is followed by most of the moms in the crowd drinking.

Here is a list of "I never" to get you started. The game works best when you make your own. Please don't say "I never slept with the groom". This is considered bad taste.

• I never...

  • Cheated on a boyfriend

  • Went skinny-dipping

  • Have seen a male stripper (you might want to play this game early in the evening).

  • lied about my age.

  • Lied about my weight.

  • Lied about my height

  • Stuffed my bra.

  • Used food in the bedroom.

  • Did a striptease for my steady.

  • Had a striptease done for me.

  • Had a one nigh stand.

  • Used a sex toy.

  • Wore a skirt without underwear.

  • Smoked Marijuana.

  • Had Liposuction

  • Had sex in a car.

  • Had sex in the living room.

  • Have been tied up.

  • Had sex on an airplane.

  • Had sex in an elevator.

  • Had sex in a swimming pool or hot tub.

  • Had sex outside.

  • Shoplifted.

  • Threw up in public.

  • Masturbated in the presence of someone else.

  • Woke up with a man who I didn't know.

  • Participated in a hot-oil massage

  • Fooled around with someone a friend liked.

  • Kissed another woman.

  • Kissed two different guys in one night.

  • Went out with a married man.

  • Had a homosexual dream.

  • Sunbathed Nude.

You might have noticed that these are all things you are not really supposed to do. If you did notice this, you understand the game perfectly.

This game is especially fun if you know a good friend has done some goofy things. Say for example your friend Wendy peed her pants once in the 6th grade. You could say "I never peed my pants in the 6th grade Christmas pageant". Everyone will be looking around to see who the heck you are talking about. Wendy will have to drink. Watch out! Wendy probably knows something nasty about you as well...

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